Tres Marias, tres Paulinas

Lulu Camello Pasamba, Marissa Ileto and I have known one another since we were in kindergarten--that's 58 years of involvement in things of childhood, adolescence, young adulthood, midlife and now, the autumn of our lives. But throughout our individual and distinctive journeys, we never lost our girlish giggles honed from years of shared fun at the campus of St. Paul College of Quezon City (now a university).

Since 2017, we've had yearly get-togethers to catch up on one another's life and doings, to air our hopes and frustrations in between nibbles of the best of the Christmas season from jamon serrano to slivers of Marca Piña cheese downed with coffee or something stiffer.

On Dec. 26, we decided on a leftover party. I brought the leftover Ponkan oranges from home, plus bars of Amparo's Apothecary soap for each of them. Speaking for myself, I think that warm baths with handmade soap are the ultimate luxury that is simple to achieve. So I've been handing out soap bars this season, to my blood sisters and to my chosen sisters like Marissa and Lulu.

From Marissa, I learned a new way to serve fried Spam. Just marinate in sugar before cooking, then the sugar provides a honeyed glaze. You can dip the meat in vinegar the way you would with tocino. For her fluffy omelette, she broke six eggs and threw in cheese, tomatoes and onions.

Lulu practically brought the contents of her fridge: potato soup, raisin bread, chicken inasal, banana loaf.

As the yearly hostess Marissa brought out the Lanelle Abueva Fernando bowls and plates and her best silverware, I realized that this was an exercise in graceful abundant living. Marissa gave each of us a lip balm. Lulu, a family medicine practitioner, brought out her acupuncture kit and offered half an hour's relaxation as she inserted needles in my knees and in Marissa's upper leg and ankle.

Before we parted, Lawin Ileto, Marissa's eldest child, took our pictures sober and drunken with merriment and the pleasure of each other's company in the house that is a chock-full of arts and crafts.

In Marissa Ileto's art-filled home, three Paulinians return. The hostess is the lady seated in the middle.

The lighter side of three professionals on the threshold of retirement

In the autumn of our years

In the autumn of these Paulinians' years, they, we still behave like the school children we were within the walls of a convent school.

Without an authority figure to oversee us, the giggles are unrestrained, the guffaws almost unlady-like, the humor enough to make the most macho of our husbands blush a rose pink.

Thank you, Elizabeth "Bibit" Esteva Llamas for being the tireless organizer of reunions not only during the Christmas season but throughout the year whenever there's former classmate flies from overseas into town. I may have missed most of those get-togethers, but the Christmas thing, I can't forego, for as long as my arthritic knees can haul me from place to place.

Once again, I took pictures to sweeten the remembering.

The first arrivals Vicki Narciso Valero and Corazon "Punay" Gonzales Gayola have time to put up their feet and chat.

In the invite we were asked to come in either green or red. Red dominated the afternoon. Here are Bibit (seated) and Pam Bañez Gonzalez in wine red.

I can't think of a more festive house to hold our party in than Marissa Ileto's (M is at the head of the table in a green sleeveless blouse). Clockwise: Marianne Martin Soriano, Vicki, Bibit, Marissa, Lyn Sanchez Garcia, Ana Marie Earnshaw Rigor, Punay and Aurora Umali who answers to two nicknames: Princess and Jing. I'm partial to Princess because she behaves like one.

Lovelier even when facing the other way: Bibit, Pam, Vicki and Grace Palma Tiongco

And then it was time for a simple game of chance called LCR (for Left, Center, Right). Out with the 20-peso bills as we took turns rolling the dice. More teasings, more laughter aimed at Marianne who was last year's winner in case Lady Luck was on her side again.

A flushed Victoria is the victor. Someone ribbed her, "O, ayan, may pamasahe ka na pauwi sa Bulacan." That's where she is spending the New Year holidays with her sons.

Parlor games that challenged our ability to bend, balance, run a short distance

Class picture of St. Paul College Quezon City High School Batch '73 as we look today. Tallest girl on the second row (fourth from left) is Socorro Tecson Mangahas who also answers to the nickname Babeth. All photos, except the last, by Babeth Lolarga

Come together, High School Class of '73

At the end of these rare reunions, a class picture is SOP beginning with the usual restrained shot followed by a wacky one. I've noticed, too, that as the years go by, no one wants to sit on the front row because of soft round bellies that, vanity dictates, have to be hidden from the viewing world. But I don't mind showing mine--it's well-earned after a day of eating, eating, eating. *Sigh*

I tend not to forget anyone's name if I still use their maiden surnames (for the marrieds) and their nicknames from childhood. Mind you, these are women who're either 59 or 60 years young. Seated (from left): Hayni Estrada, Jill Racela, Eugene Mesina and Babeth. Standing are: Ana Marie Earnshaw, Maan Martin, Vickie Narciso, Concept Zamora, Pam Bañez, Marissa Ileto, Baby Tecson, Bibit Esteva and Lyn Sanchez.

Host Baby Tecson-Mangahas left this tarp of images from our generation to keep the sun out. Later, baby photos of some members of the class were put over the tarp for a guessing game. Baby says she hasn't taken down the tarp. It's a nostalgic trip for any group that comes over to her home. BTW, Baby also uses Babette as her nickname--she chose it when she entered college because she thought Baby was too, uhh, infantile for a tall woman like her.

A child of the '60s and '70s caught between Janis Joplin and Audrey Hepburn. Thanks, Marissa, for taking this pic. She took it when she saw me struggling to do a selfie that always came out baluktot!

While catching up on one another's life, they nibbled on watermelon seeds, something I couldn't anymore impose on my fragile teeth. No wonder I was the hungriest when lunch was served. I had a box of Rodic's famed tapsilog for appetizers before I went on to the bangus and pork sinigang. Baby's family is behind Rodic's. You can't be a true State U alumna if you haven't tried Rodic's at UP Shopping Center.

Pancho Llamas, Bibit's big half, served as game master. He went high-tech, using a flat screen with a laptop attached for the quizzes.

This game revolved around the number One and its variations and sound-alikes: first, Juan, uno, isa.

Baby approaches the stool to ring the bell, confident that she has the correct answer. Since the party was set in the garden, we came in flower power clothes.

Jumping for joy for each correct answer

While having our dessert of Calea cheesecake and Nathaniel's buko pandan ice cream, we played Pinoy Genyo that still had a Christmas theme. It was fun watching Concept guess what was written on her head. When the bell rang and she saw the word "magi," she quipped, "How will I be able to guess that? It's not something I associate with Christmas. Magi we use in the kitchen!"

Hearty congratulations to Bibit for being our class' tireless organizer of reunions. We promise to do our bit in assisting her at the next happy occasion where we all revert to the sweetness and lightness of girlhood.

First of 2 nom nom days

“In the dark times
Will there also be singing?
Yes, there will also be singing.
About the dark times.”
~ Bertolt Brecht

To me laughing with and among friends is a form of singing in these horridly hot times. The Sunday and Monday past, I felt privileged to be among friends again after the relative isolation imposed by Manila's heat on me this summer. I spent close to two months just within the walls and arms of family in Baguio so the summons from Gilda Cordero Fernando, who is her own best events organizer, to join her in Antipolo on May 25 couldn't be ignored. Neither could Angge Goloy's to be with the ladies who lunch in Tagaytay on May 26.

Come down, come down from wherever you are. I did, chancing it as a Victory Liner passenger at past one in the morning on a Sunday. I told my husband that I wasn't sure anymore how much time I have left or for that matter, how long in the world my own friends will be around. So many loved ones had left abruptly in recent months and years. I wasn't going to wait for another occasion.

So here we are again, captured in pictures. Gilda's event was an advanced 84th birthday lunch at daughter-in-law Lanelle Abueva Fernando's Crescent Moon Restaurant in Antipolo City. The heavens were kind. The sky was overcast so temperature was below stifling

By happenstance, in a separate dining area, old pal from kindergarten years Marissa Ileto was also present with her family. They were feting a balikbayan cousin. That was totally unplanned. So I made sure the moment was captured with her kids Issa and Lawin flanking us.

When Marissa saw the photos, she went: "Naku magka height na tayo! At the rate I am going, chomping away and sitting all day, my width is soon to follow! Nom nom nom..." Nom nom nom means "yummy." At least for me that is what it means. Apparently for others, it's drinking alcohol.

Nom nom nom was the buffet spread that Lanelle's crew laid out: plain lugaw with over a dozen toppings or condiments to choose from (I returned for the slices of century eggs more than twice), crisp fried noodles again with sahog of your choice (new experience was having curried vegetables and tofu for the toppings), among others.

It was actually former UP President Jose Abueva's birthday. He and Gilda are mag balae (he was pa-in-law to Gilda's eldest son, the late Bey), she the mod mom-in-law of Lanelle. Gilda's BFF Mariel Francisco teased that La Gilda chose that day to celebrate to earn a "free ride." She was riding onto the Abueva event.

GCF (the lady second from left wearing what my sisters and I called "muscle shirt") with Edna Zapanta Manlapaz, Mariel and Ning Encarnacion Tan. The fans or abanico on the table are production designer Gino Gonzales's presents to Gilda and guests, the butterflies came from Mariel (saved from a granddaughter's birthday party).

The loooooong table with no permanent seat arrangements. Each one, after finishing his/her food, stood to move around which is what Gilda likes about her parties. No one stays put with just one conversation partner. Clockwise: Juju Tan, Chit Roces Santos, Karina Bolasco, GCF, Nonon Padilla, Ning, Manny Chaves, Mariel (standing) Gino, Lorna Kalaw Tirol and Edna.

The Gemini girl with a birthday coming soon demanded a group photo before we broke up and headed for home. The production designer in Gino couldn't stand the idea that we'd have a row ofcaldero for our background so the chairs were re-arranged to cover the buffet table and to prevent back lighting. We also followed his instruction to hold our fans. Front row (from left) Lorna, Rita Ledesma, Gilda, me and Gino. Second row: Mariel, Lanelle, Chit, Manny, Edna Juju, Nonon and Karina.

Everyone's summer muse or how we hope we'll look like if we're blessed to reach the age of 84

Most photos by Babeth Lolarga

Old old works that look new

If there's anything that the deaths of friends and relatives and the spate of calamities that hit the country have taught me, it's a certain kind of detachment to things once considered precious--those objects with sentimental value that one doesn't want to release to the archives or give away to nearest kin and dearest friends as gifts.

I've kept these works for several decades already. When I checked the back of the drawings or the front and corners, I was more daring in signing my name. These works are all from the year 1969.

I was then a seventh grader at St. Paul College Quezon City (SPCQ). That was the year when Sister Glyceria became our art teacher--she had just attended the Philippine Art Educators Association summer workshop that year or the year before. Art education became a required, but minor, subject, just like music. (Needless to say, I had a stint in Glee Club-bing, too, as a soprano.)

Between visual arts and singing, these days I just sing along to my YouTube collection of songs from the '30s (when my parents were children) all the way to 2013, the year I discovered Adele.

I've kept going with the painting and occasional drawing. I still use dry media sometimes. Oil pastels were my fave medium in the '60s and'70s.

Let me confess something I know in my gut: I was bolder in '69 than today. I guess part of the boldness stemmed from youthfulness. I was fearless about committing mistakes, and I was proud of my works. Otherwise, why would I have stored them this long? When I think about it, art, unlike like-or-death medical surgery, allows for mistakes. That thought can certainly embolden a 13-year-old girl.

Tomorrow most of these works are going to a friend, who must have been a sister in a past life. She has always been appreciative of the things I do with my hands.

Meanwhile, some batchmates from that SPCQ Class of '73 met up with the school's alumni association prez, Verge Gepuela, for lunch to turn over two separate checks, one for the Bohol quake survivors, the second for Yolanda's orphans, all from the collections made from our silver and ruby jubilees. The amount ain't much considering the magnitude of these twin tragedies, but what's important is the donations came from the the hearts, not just the pockets, of surviving members of Class '73.

Happy and grateful, at last, to be a Paulinian.

At St. Paul University's cafe on the Aurora Blvd. and Gilmore Ave, QC, campus are (seated from left): Concept, now Marie, Zamora-Lazo, Verge Gepuela, Hayni Estrada-Prudente, Vicki Narciso-Valero and Bibit Esteva-Llamas. Standing are Babeth and Marissa Ileto, my inspiration for her style of creative living (she was the original fine arts major in the class).

The ones who never left my side

They're two of my favorite creative collaborators: Lynett Villariba and Marissa Ileto. Plus factor is they're my pals, too. But I haven't had a chance to do a project with Lynett since she became the extremely busy artistic director of Philippine Daily Inquirer. Marissa is now an international English-as-second-language teacher but is still based in Manila. We are doing our high school batch's souvenir program. Maybe it's part of aging but the process has become slower despite computer technology. Occasion for this social was the book launch of Bobi Valenzuela's essay collection, Minsan, sa Tag-araw, at the old Hiraya Gallery.

One of the three guys seated with me, Caloy Abrera (second from left), left this world abruptly and with a loud clanging of bells and steel. The other one, poet Jolicco de Cuadra (to my right), is gravely ill with Parkinson's disease. His long-time partner, Auggusta de Almeidda, is trying to find a way to keep his medications in steady supply. Apparently still in good form, especially where singing is concerned, is baritone Alex Dacanay (holding his lunch bowl). This was taken in 2002 at Jerry Araos's garden in Antipolo on the occasion of the sculptor's birthday.

Them were the days indeed when we could drink one bottle of beer after another and not even count how many. And we always chose to sit in the smoking section! Oh my, are we all, Sam Sarmenta, Cynthia Alberto Diaz, Dario Noche, Louie-an Pilapil, the blogger, Joel Sarmenta, Amadis Ma. Guerrero, Francis whose last name I've temporarily forgotten, and Rustie Otico, now paying our dues, health-wise. Sam I'd occasionally see in our Kapitolyo neighborhood taking morning walks. At least there's one exercise-conscious member of the Friday Club.

Obviously, from the color they're wearing, this was Valentine's Day in 2011 when Jacqui Magno, my favorite Pinay jazz singer along with Gou de Jesus (Gou, magparamdam ka naman), had a gig at Merk's Place on Pasay Road. Anna Leah Sarabia is my long-time friend from her Filipinas Foundation years when she was a Makati office girl and still carried a de Leon surname. She has come a long, long way from that, and if she weren't too busy with feminist,  anti-tobacco and pro-RH advocacies, she has many memories to put down on paper. I'm wearing a sling because I broke my elbow in January that year. It healed miraculously through the intercession of poet-healer Mila Aguilar whose book of poems, Chronicle of a Life Foretold, was launched to much acclaim recently.

Anna Leah calls this picture "The Baguio Mafia," although I am hardly in the city up north these days, except for the recent semestral and Halloween break. Baboo Mondoñedo on my right is  a frequent collaborator as far as mounting watercolor shows goes. Her own collection of personal essays should be out by the new year. It is Laida's eldest daughter, Padma Perez, who's more my barkada. Laida though is an inspiration because not only is she Ms. Serenity herself, her slow-food and organic market advocacies in Baguio have taken deep roots apart from her support for weavers of handmade textiles. These beautiful textiles she wears with elegance.Her Cafe by the Ruins guava jam and tart are up there in my to-die-for list.

The is the Babeth-Gilda duet, taken by Anna Leah in 2010 at the old Kiss the Cook Gourmet location during a concert for a cause, featuring baritone Andrew Fernando (no relation to Gilda), flutist Christopher Oracion and pianist Mary Anne Espina, to benefit the Free Ericson Acosta Campaign. Ericson is good friend Pablo Tariman's son-in-law, a political prisoner in Calbayog City, Samar.

Taken at The Peninsula Manila when Australia-based Japanese ceramics artist Shoko Mafune visited last. Mariano Garchitorena, the dapper-looking tisoy, always hosts our reunion dinners and long lingering coffee chats afterwards. Always present on these occasions also is Noel Soler Cuizon, whose time is taken up teaching fine arts full-time at the Philippine Women's University.