Lessons from Enrico Manlapaz

Before I turned to my right last night to fall back to sleep after being wakened by my grandchild’s cry and tucking her in with her working mother who had just finished her last online assignment for the evening, I heard the cell phone ping. I thought I had turned it off (that has been my practice every night).

 The message was poignant in its brevity: “At 9:33 p.m. of 13 April, Rico Manlapaz passed into eternal life. Babeth, kindly inform G and other artist friends.”

Early today, I returned to my correspondence with Enrico JL Manlapaz, usually one-sided with barely a response from me for what sort of reply could I cough up when he shared what he called his pabugso-bugso thoughts from a contraption called Yahoo! Mail on Android?

It was from Rico that I learned how not to be “mushy” (his word) about death. In the outtakes of our interview for a contributed piece to the Inquirer (published on the last Sunday of February), he spoke about how he had instructed his nearest kin that upon his death, his remains should be immediately cremated. Apart from that, he wanted no urn, no crypt, no wake.

We managed to stay in touch off and on since we reconnected through Facebook some years ago. When I unplugged my account, the email correspondence continued until March this year. Silence from his end began in April. I don't know what state of mind or physical pain he was in. But I still hear you, Rico.

Starting mid-February, I have been bothered by news feeds inquiring about the difference between fasting and abstinence. I obliged by simply saying that fasting is totally avoiding food for one meal or one day depending on age and health.

Abstinence, on the other hand is avoiding meat such a chicken, pork, and beef for one day.

But that is the shallow definition of abstinence. The clerics just could not say that abstinence is avoiding carnal activities such as coitus and masturbation.

Now, did you know that?

***

Everything uttered through your mouth has been processed, screened, analyzed, and finalized in your subconscious brain, where all intuitive thoughts emanate from.

There is no such thing as a slip of the tongue. You meant what you said, but it was too fast to edit it. And it came out. And you find everyone around looking at you strangely.

I take advantage of this in my organization development workshops, whether they be about culture definition, planning, budgetting, etc.

Especially in the area of personal values, Filipinos are just too shy to open their mouth, as though there is a right and a wrong answer.

I ask them to blurt out the first thing that comes to mind when I ask a question. I end up with quality answers.

***

Lip service is the easiest, most convenient, and most effortless thing to do. You do not even have to rise from your seat or bed to send a text message as “I am sorry to hear that. He had been part of our family.” You do not even have to think twice what to say. First thing that comes to mind may suffice.

The nice thing about lip service is that even if the words are well selected, they absolutely mean nothing. But they can give incomparable personal satisfaction for both the giver and the receiver.

Try lip service. Doing it so often and regularly will make you a different person.

I just encountered another slight mind-jarring experience in Facebook. Practicing the Presence through Mind and Meditation. Sounds surreal.

From what I have learned in my almost sixty years in this current existence, what governs everything in the entire cosmos is an idea which I prefer to call “Universal Mind.”

Some refer to it as God, Divine Presence, Omniscient Being, Creator, Heavenly Father, etc. Some refer to it as Aum, alluding to the belief that everything existed via a sound, much like  “ ahem ” when one wakes up.

As the Universal Mind can only “create” from itself, does it follow then that all of creation, everything and everyone, are of the same essence as the Universal Mind? Therefore, the Universal Mind is in everyone of us.

Only certain religions concocted the idea that God is separate from us. That is for the sole purpose of inventing a “bridge” to connect to God. And we all know what this means.

Asian and more “primitive” belief systems are more attuned to the “God in Me” system. “Aloha” says the Hawaiian. “Namaste”, “Namaskar” says the Indian. “Wei” says the Thai. Yes, all these terms mean "I greet God in You."

Why meditate to practice the Presence? Everything that happens to you, everything that occurs within you, and everything you think, say, or do, all emanate from the Divine in you.

It was the Buddha who said: “The purpose of travel is arrival.”

Life is the journey, nothingness its destination. Travel well, arrive well.

This is the essence of a good life: That one can enjoy the fruits of his activity and in the end consider them all nonsense and useless. Satisfy all your desires and live a life of complete detachment. Learn to undo your deeds if necessary.

After all, there is no meaning at all to amass material things or to achieve greatness in this or that. Achievements and wealth only satisfy the ego. Lose the self and find yourself happy.

I prefer short meaningful travels (so I can) arrive fresh and be ready for adventure. Long trips are meaningless and tiresome.

Photos of Mr. Manlapaz by ARNOLD ALMACEN